Point of view

I've won my share of awards, grants and fellowships in my career, I suppose, if none lately, but I confess I would like to win something or other in this last act of my life so that I may speak out about certain literary matters from the point of view of "a winner," rather than being accused of "sour grapes" if I said these exact same things without this context. Whether or not this happens remains to be seen. I've been passed on some work I think is far better than work I've won awards for, but this is par for the course in an arena driven by the singular tastes of judges and committees. One needs to get lucky with the right work in front of the right judge at the right time. Alas, in a zero-sum universe, I got so lucky so early I'm still making up the difference ha ha. Yet nothing is predictable in the literary world, so I may get lucky yet again. And if I don't, well, at the last minute I suppose I can go on record and let the echo of "sour grapes" follow me to my grave. It just would be so much damn fun to speak out as a winner! and not give the other side a cheap shot in retort. Feisty to the end.