Devil's Dictionary

DIPLOMACY, n. The patriotic art of lying for one's country.

DISCUSSION, n. A method of confirming others in their errors.

DISTANCE, n. The only thing that the rich are willing for the poor to call theirs, and keep.

DISTRESS, n. A disease incurred by exposure to the prosperity of a friend.

DOG, n. A kind of additional or subsidiary Deity designed to catch the overflow and surplus of the world's worship.

DRAMATIST, n. One who adapts plays from the French.

DULLARD, n. A member of the reigning dynasty in letters and life.