Linus Pauling

OPB's Oregon Experience recently had a nice documentary on Linus Pauling. Pauling, it turns out, played a small but important role in my own journey.

I started my sophomore year at Cal Tech in a confused state of mind. I was doing well enough: a B-average, A's in all my math courses (my major) and Mathematics Magazine had accepted a number theory article of mine. But I was unhappy. I realized for the first time that I really wasn't bright enough to be the "pure mathematician" I wanted to be. I had no desire to be an engineer or "practical" scientist. Moreover, my good friend with whom I had gone from Pasadena High School to Cal Tech had committed suicide that summer. (In retrospect, I believe he was a closet gay.) I'd dropped football due to an injury, even through at the end of spring practice I was first string QB in the single wing, a blocking position, and second string tailback. Worse, I was still living at home, Cal Tech being in Pasadena. I felt in my gut it was time to leave home.

In this state I was sitting on a bench on campus, eating my lunch, one fall afternoon. Linus Pauling strolled by and asked if he could join me. He'd been my freshman chemistry professor. I also had become something of a groupy of his new book No More War.

He sat down and for some reason I opened up to him when he asked how things were going. I don't remember much from that encounter but what I do remember is that he gave me a pep talk about the importance of having good humanists in the world, every bit as important as having good scientists. There was nothing wrong with leaving Cal Tech for another college and majoring in philosophy or history, which is what I was thinking of doing.

His pep talk influenced my decision. I left at the end of the term and transferred to Berkeley. My wild ride of changes had just begun and by the end of the summer I'd be in the Army. But leaving home, leaving Cal Tech with a B average, needed validation and Linus Pauling gave it to me. I've always thought his pep talk about the humanities made all the difference in the world.